Talking to Kids About the Vietnam War

Vietnam War anniversary: a chance to talk to your kids about war As a mother, I'm always looking for inspirational stories to share with my children. April 30 marks the 34th anniversary of the end of the Vietnam War. Whether it's on the TV or computer or in school, they'll hear stories about the war and conflicting views about whether it was just or unjust.

Difficult as it may be, I think this is a good time for parents to talk to their kids about the consequences of war.

If parents or grandparents have war stories to share, especially tales of heroism that inspired them, this is a great time to share those stories. Today, as we honor the heroes who fought in the war, let's also honor the unsung heroes, the Vietnam citizens, including many mothers and children, who as American supporters after the war had become the new enemy inside their own country.

Here is an inspirational Vietnam War story I recently shared with my kids: In 1978, five years after the Vietnam War ended, Kim Le was just six-years old. She remembers taking her mother's hand and heading into the darkness of Saigon, not understanding why her family needed to leave. Le and her four-year-old brother Quang clung to their mother as they stepped inside a bicycle-propelled rickshaw and journeyed to a nearby river, praying they wouldn't be captured by military police and sent to a 're-education' camp.

"We had no idea where we were going," Le says, noting that the movie The Killing Fields comes closest to depicting the intensity of the times. Back then, Le couldn't have imagined that the excitement of the evening would soon turn into a years-long nightmare of realizing she'd lost everything-her home, father, three older brothers, grandmother, and even more inconceivably, her country.

Nor could she have guessed that the near-starvation and extreme poverty she would soon face would embolden and inspire her years later to succeed beyond her wildest dreams.

An underground army leads the way Though her memory of her escape from Vietnam is sketchy, she recalls certain details vividly, such as how her mother kept hushing her and her four-year-old brother Quang to stay quiet inside the rickshaw as they sped toward a nearby river.
She remembers watching in wonder as the rickshaw occasionally stopped for her mother to receive directions from strangers, who seemed to be guiding them on a mysterious adventure.

Later Le would learn these strangers were part of an underground army of volunteers, who had helped ensure the safety of their clandestine journey. Her mother brought no luggage and had dressed them all as plainly as possible. "She wanted us to look like we were on our way to visit our grandmother in case we were stopped and questioned.
" Le didn't feel scared. "For me, it was fun to be out at night. I had no clue what was happening or how scary it must have been for my mother to have left everything behind.
" Trading gold for freedom Fortunately, Le's mother, then 34-years old, had gold, which she used to buy their passage to freedom.
At the time, printed currency was worthless in the country due to hyperinflation, so people bartered with gold and silver or useful items, such as produce or livestock. The gold, exchanged before they left for the trip (so they couldn't be captured with it on them) bought the three of them a ride on a tiny, overcrowded fishing boat, which they boarded along with a dozen other families and headed out onto the open seas.
History would soon refer to them as the "boat people.
" Le doesn't remember much about the boat ride itself except that after a week, they'd run out of what little rice they had and water.

Their throats were parched and their stomachs ached with hunger.
"My mom tells me I kept asking her 'Why did you take us here?' I missed my danh từ (my grandma) and didn't understand why we couldn't be back home with her." Years later Le learned that her dad and three older brothers had been captured by military police a few days after her escape.

They were sent to a 're-education camp,' where they would remain hidden for years in the wilderness of Vietnam, along with thousands of other prisoners, most of whom had committed no crime other than supporting Americans.
Hunting for the Promised (or any) land After staring out at nothing but sea for seven days, Le remembers how exciting it had been to see the first glimmer of land in the horizon. "We were all shocked; we had no idea we'd found Malaysia.
We just knew wherever we were headed had to be better than where we were coming from.

" Le only vaguely recalls jumping off the boat into the icy cold water and swimming to shore.
"I still don't know how we did that.
I didn't know how to swim, and my mother and brother didn't either.
" They lived in a United Nations-sponsored refugee camp in Malaysia for a year, surviving on UN donations and rations and sharing a makeshift tent with several other families.
Rations included mostly rice and dry food that they received once a week. Vegetables were a special treat.

"My brother and I got very excited about those rare occasions when we got to eat vegetables.
" (When I told my kids about this, I added: "See? Some kids don't have iPods and XBoxes - they are happy if they get vegetables.

" Preachy, I know, but I couldn't help myself.

) Nearby wells supplied water, she added, but it was a limited supply.
"If we waited too long, the water might run out for the day.

Long lines for water started early in the morning.
" Saved by a stranger In 1979, someone from the US sponsored Le's family, allowing them to immigrate to the States. "I will be forever grateful to this kind man.

Many other families had to live in that camp for as long as five years.

" When they arrived in the US, they moved in with their sponsor, who graciously welcomed them to his home in Columbus, Ohio.

They later moved to Tucson, Arizona after learning a distant cousin lived there. "We rented a tiny one-bedroom guest house and received public assistance.

" At the time, no one in her family knew a word of English. To support the family, Le's mother worked minimum wage jobs.

"She always told me that getting an education would be the only way to get out of our situation.

" Education leads the way out of poverty Le was only too happy to focus on her studies.
Though her mother still struggled to learn English, Le took on the role as family translator.
In grade school, she'd have to write her own excuse notes on days she had a flu or cold.

Craving more control over her destiny, she stepped up her game in college. "I would sit down and rewrite my notes after each class and do my homework then, too, while it was all fresh in my memory.
That helped a lot.
" Supporting herself through college, she went on to graduate summa cum laude from Arizona State University with a 4.
0 GPA and bachelor's degree in accounting.
Finally, the happy ending In 2003, Le, now the mother of two, started on her own accounting consulting firm, A2Q2 LLC, serving publicly traded companies. At the end of 2008, A2Q2 employed 10 people and generated revenues in excess of $1 million.
Le adds, "Poverty is a great motivator.

I had to succeed because I didn't ever want to live like that again.
" Today, she offers her largely Asian staff business etiquette training, to help them understand and feel more comfortable with American customs. For example, she says, "In Asia, it's acceptable to slurp your noodles.
But if you do that during a business lunch here, you are considered rather rude.
" When other immigrants ask her for her advice, she encourages them to "'Dream big.

' There will be those who tell you that you can't do it-don't listen to them.

It will be harder than you think but not as hard as others tell you it will be.
"